Ponder this: The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with His singing. Zephaniah 3:17 (NIV)

And this: Praise be to the God and Father of all compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 (NIV)

Suffering is not the opposite of living. In fact, anyone who has suffered greatly knows that we are very alive when we feel the excruciating pain of suffering. Suffering, seeking God, demanding answers, anger—these are the signs of life, even abundant life. The opposite of this is emotional deadness, emptiness, apathy, lack of curiosity and lack of seeking. This is not abundant life, and a way to avoid pain.

I have pondered the meaning of suffering probably more than I have any other concept in life, and talked to God about it for as long as I can remember. It wasn’t just an intellectual exercise. Angst can turn a person into a philosopher. In my life of work I explore the meaning of suffering with others daily. Even those who do not believe bring God onto conversations about suffering. Somehow suffering binds us to God.

When we suffer we do not feel powerful. Suffering takes us to places inside ourselves we would never choose to go otherwise. It can humble us, and help us see our small place in the universe. We have to mentally wander outside ourselves and our own lives and look at the rest of the world. Then we find we are not alone in our pain.

Frequently people will feel that no one’s suffering is as bad as theirs, or that theirs is not as bad as others. Often both ideas are a defense. Either I am special and get my sense of value from my unfortunate circumstance, or I give myself a pep talk to deny the reality of my pain. Auchwitz survivor and psychologist Victor Frankl said, “Never compare suffering. Everyone has their own Auchwitz.” If we just accept that suffering comes to us at some time in our life, we can learn the lesson it has to teach us.

While none of us would sign up for suffering, some of us—even those who have suffered greatly would not trade what we learned from the experience after it is over. Since every experience we have can offer an awareness of a different facet of God. In pain we get to know God in ways that it would be impossible to know Him otherwise. God can be for us what we have not yet needed or allowed God to be prior to our trials.